WORD OF THE DAY:
Chapter 4: The PRACTICE of INCLUDING
“There is no us and them. There’s only us.” - Ken Lloyd
WORD OF THE DAY:
INCLUSION
Include – Verb
1. To create a space that makes room for all people
2. To intentionally embrace and value differences
“Full inclusion for all people across sexual and gender identities, race, socioeconomics, and abilities shouldn’t be a stretch, especially at tables of the Christian faith based on the teachings of Jesus, the master includer. While the early church gathered people together around radically diverse tables, a wild mix of humans touched by Jesus’ message, we can’t escape that much of church history points to the practices of excluding, conquering, and controlling.” (72)
WORD OF THE DAY: COMFORT
“We don’t like being around people who are different from us because it makes us uncomfortable. And let’s admit it: we humans are addicted to what’s comfortable and known.” (72)
“Including also sometimes threatens our theological convictions, which often override the practice of love. Many just can’t get around what we were taught in certain churches or our families about particular groups of people or behaviors….Even though our desire is to be people of inclusion, when the rubber meets the road we often start to feel disrupted and uncomfortable and stop short. We’re used to maintaining the status quo and keeping an often unspoken but sometimes overt distance from people different than us is always easier.” (73)
WORD OF THE DAY: CENTERING
“Real transformation will happen when we center ourselves around folks who are typically on the margins. ...Centering means completely upending power structures that have been in place for generations.” (75)
“True inclusion demands that we recognize that only in our diversity do we more perfectly reflect the divinity of our expansive Creator. Whenever we are compelled to declare that someone doesn’t belong, whether it’s because of their sexuality, ethnicity, background, beliefs, political affiliations, disruptiveness, neediness, inconvenience, struggles, immaturity, etc., we are dehumanizing ourselves and the one(s) we are excluding. That is an assault on the very image and likeness of God in the world.” (Brandan Robertson)
WORD OF THE DAY: WALLS
“Walls are usually never built by the under-resourced…..Walls are always built by those with the most power and are used to separate and exclude.” (76)
“The bottom line is that we human beings have an innate tendency to be judgers, separators, and excluders. We feel threatened by change or anyh disruption that may cause us to lose power. We may try to fool ourselves into thinking it’s ot about power, but it always is. Across all levels of humanity, the desire to get power and retain power – whether conscious or not – is always real and is always threaded into exclusion. It’s why we build walls.” (77)
WORD OF THE DAY: TABLES
“The apostles remembered what many modern Christians tend to forget – that what makes the gospel offensive isn’t who it keeps out, but who it lets in.” (Rachel Held Evans)
“As people of faith and practice, we should be the biggest table-makers in town! Our tables should have room for everyone – the freinge, the lonely, doubters, pious believers, poor, rich, educated, uneducated, men, women, nonbinary, gay, straight, black, white, brown, young, old, liberal, conservative, and EVERYTHING in between. We can always add more leaves to make the table bigger and pull up more chairs. Around tables is where our shared humanity emerges, where we can listen, learn, and find that although we seem so different, we’re all really longing for the same things – to love and be loved, to give and to receive.” (79)
WORD OF THE DAY: WELCOME
“Welcome is not the same an inclusion….there’s always a but...” (81)
“Welcome is about open doors. It says, “Sure you can be a part of us, but with certain conditions that limit. Inclusion is about fully open tables and hearts where there is only us, unconditionally, period…..Part of the practice of inclusion is recognizing this difference. (82)
God, help us become people and practitioners of inclusion. Heal our insecurities, fears, and self-protections. Give us courage to widen tables, break down walls, open doors, and expand hearts. Amen.
Chapter 5: The Practice of EQUALIZING
“Reconciliation requires imagination. It requires looking beyond what is to what could be.” - Austin C. Brown
WORD OF THE DAY: EQUAL
Equalize verb
1. To level imbalances between people or things
2. To create consistency across differences
3. To intentionally dismantle inequalities
“The practice of equalizing and including have a lot of overlap,...but including is about actively integrating all of us together – individuals and groups – as a life practice. The practice of equalizing is about recognizing and working to shift disparate power for under-empowered groups. At the core of equalizing is the belief that every human has an equal, full, unequivocal worth and dignity alongside every other human.” (94)
WORD OF THE DAY: CREATIVITY
“Equalizing will require creative justice….One size doesn’t fit all.” (100)
“A good forward step in the practice of equalizing includes a painful self-awareness and historical awareness so that we can be honest about what we’re up against.” James Baldwin writes, ‘Any real change implies the breakup of the world as one has always known it, the loss of all that gave one an identity, the end of safety.’ (101) Hmmm...with this pandemic chaos, are we in the midst of creative change?
WORD OF THE DAY:
KINGDOM of HEAVEN
“The Kingdom of Heaven isn’t going to just drop out of the sky.” Alexia Torres Fleming
“Equality won’t, either…..New life, hope, and change aren’t going to magically drop on our doorstep because we wish for it, long for it, pray for it, share memes on Facebook about it. As much as we all want it to come quickly, we are not going to wake up anytime soon with equal tables, equal voices, equal leadership, equal dignity, equal rights. … We, in all our flawed,beautiful, failing,and flailing ways, are tasked with being the ones who work to create it. (97)
WORD OF THE DAY:
PRIVILEGE
“Privilege is the ability to opt out….we don’t have to be ashamed to admit we benefit from privilege. But the more we acknowledge, wrestle, engage, process, and get it out on the table honestly, the more transformation is possible.” (101)
“Our bristling, defensiveness, and protectiveness around privilege creates harmful denial. It’s painful to talk honestly about our jacked-up systems and the ways many of us have benefitted while others have suffered. It’s painful to talk about the ways we have huddled in our churches and homogeneous groups and protected ourselves from the realitieis that are now making their way into our living room TVs and Facebook feeds at a rapid rate.” (102)
“I think white Christians are resistant to acknowledging ‘privilege’ and ‘white supremacy’ because those concepts make it clear that white Christian history is clearly at odds with the prophetic tradition that proclaims God stands on the side of the oppressed.” - Ramon, page 103
WORD OF THE DAY:
MUTUALITY
“Saying we’re equal and being equal are two entirely different things. Equality cannot be defined by how the people who hold the power feel about it.” (110)
“Mutuality means mutual dependence, reciprocity. I believe mutuality is the fullest expression of the Kingdom of God, with no one under or over another but rather alongside, mutually submitting to one another, sacrificing for each other, following and leading, honoring the giftedness and wisdom of each other, ...giving and receiving, humility and respect.” (109)
Chapter 6: The Practice of ADVOCATING
"Everyone gives. Everyone receives.”
Sunday 8.16.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
ADVOCATE
Advocate – verb
1. To work on behalf of someone in need of justice, support, or care
2. To empower and hold others up
“In John 14 advocate is used to describe the Holy Spirit and means ‘summoned, called to come to one’s side or aid’. It also means comforter, helper, aid, assistant, encourager. An advocate also gives voice to the silenced and defends. ...We all can BE an advocate and we all NEED an advocate. (It tends to be far easier to be the giver than the receiver!” (121)
WORD OF THE DAY:
TO – FOR – WITH
“The language of with, as opposed to to and for, changes everything:
TO is paternal and creates opposition
FOR is maternal and creates codependence
WITH is incarnational and creates transformation” (122)
“Both to and for are one-way, one-up/one-down relationships.,,,With is heart to heart, shoulder to shoulder, eye to eye. It is built on equal value, mutuality, and arises from relationship instead of stepping in and trying to solve problems on your own terms. With is centered on ‘I am with you, not walking ahead, but alongside.’ (123)
WORD OF THE DAY:
VOICE
“A central part of advocacy is magnifying voices that are often unheard. We can use our power and privilege on behalf of others by simply ‘telling their story’.” 125
We need to be a voice for the voiceless. Yet everyone has a voice, we just need to magnify it. How can we use our privilege, power, and resources to elevate the voices of those who can’t say it for themselves? (126)
WORD OF THE DAY:
ORDINARY
We can all be ordinary activists where we all can play our part in advocating for others. …. writing letters, making phone calls, showing up for city or country town hall meetings, signing petitions, learning more about issues so we educate ourselves and can communicate core issues better. (129)
“Ordinary activism has to do with ordinary people understanding they are part of how change happens and how the world gets to be a better place...it erupts from people’s hearts and guts; they see an injustice, know that harm is being done, and step in to do something about it.” HR Knight, p.130
WORD OF THE DAY:
ANGEL
There’s a commonly shared phrase extrapolated from the Jewish tradition that says, “Every blade of grass has its own angel bending over it, whispering, ‘Grow, grow’. May we be these kinds of angels for each other.
God, help us learn what means to be WITH others.
Give us patience, perseverance, and humility as we advocate and encourage.
Keep us grounded in the ordinary as we magnify voices and use our own.
May justice and healing prevail.
AMEN.
Chapter 7: The Practice of MOURNING
Tears are sacred….they water the ground around our feet so that new things can grow. - Ron Bell
WORD OF THE DAY:
MOURN
Mourn Verb
1. To feel the pain and sadness of grief
2. To experience the heartache of a death or loss
3. To emotionally express feelings of lament
“Mourning is allowing ourselves to feel hurt, sorrow, anger, loss, and grief...The hardest part isn’t knowing what loss feels like. We’ve got that one nailed down. The trickier work is knowing what to do with our loss and how to mourn….While loss and grief are a natural part of the rhythms of life, unfortunately, contemporary fast-and-furious Western culture has often sent a direct message that grief is something to move through quickly, deal with, figure out, move on from. ...Families, churches, organizations desperately need people who know HOW to practice mourning so we can become more integrated and less divided not only as individuals but as groups. (141-142)
WORD OF THE DAY:
EASTER GRIEF, EASTER JOY
“Pretending we don’t hurt when we do only increases the likelihood of more pain later.” (143)
“Over the years I am continuing to learn the art of acknowlerdging the beauty of what I like to call FRIDAY, SATURDAY, and SUNDAY LIVING. Without death, pain, tears, and suffering, we can’t really experience life. Death, sadness, life. Loss, lament, resurrection. They all bleed together in a mysterious way.” (143)
WORD OF THE DAY:
DENIAL
Most of us are used to minimizing, justifying, rationalizing, rejecting, ignoring, or pretending we’re not in as much pain as we actually are. It’s almost like life is too busy to feel. It usually always harms us in the end. (145)
“I have heard a lot of people share their pain and brush it off with, ‘But I know it’s a first world problem. There are people literally starving to death in Africa right now so it could be way worse.’ My friend, Adrienne, whose four-year-old son Noah died from a comparatively unknown illness, says something that reverberates in my soul: ‘grief can’t be graded’. (145)
WORD OF THE DAY:
BROKEN HEARTS
There are at least two ways to understand what it means to have our hearts broken. One is to imagine the heart broken into shards and scattered about – a feeling most of us know, and a fate we would like to avoid. The other is to imagine the heart broken open into a new capacity….this small, tight fist of a thing called my heart can break open into greater capacity to hold more of my own and the world’ s suffering and joy, despair and hope. (Parker Palmer, p. 147
“Our capacity for heartbreak is not something to run away from but to run toward. There’s no need to toughen up; in fact, the world’s got enough armor on already. We get how to do that. Being people with open, broken hearts is what’s desperately needed.” (148)
WORD OF THE DAY:
LAMENT
Lament is about letting our hearts feel what needs to be felt and not trying to do a bypass on big feelings. It is ‘OK” to let it rip with God. (148-149)
“Lamenting helps us not move too quickly toward action, which can be our human way of trying to shortcut the rough and visceral work of lament. … Moving to action too quickly is our way of avoiding the pain, and this is one of the reasons we have so many examples of false and superficial healing.” (149)
Wednesday 8.26.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
KINTSUGI
Kintsugi is the Japanese art form where a precious metal is used to bring together the pieces of a broken pottery item and transform it into something whole and beautiful. …. The words kin and tsugi together mean ‘Golden Repair’. (155)
"Making beauty from the brokenness is part of our work in the world. Like everything it starts with us. We can’t pass on what we aren’t willing to experience ourselves. As we embrace our losses instead of trying to rush through grief, and learn to hold others in their pain as well, not only will we be transformed but we will help others heal as well. We will become people of golden repair." (155)
Chapter 8: The Practice of FAILING
“G’morning. You’re gonna make mistakes.” - Lin Manuel Miranda
Thursday 8.27.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
FAILURE
FAIL - Verb
1. To be unsuccessful in meeting the desired outcome
2. To miss the mark
3. To be unable to do something after repeated attempts
“Failure is part of the human experience, yet, there aren’t many places to talk about failure and embrace it as a natural part of life….We are all sure to fail at some point and owning our stories instead of hiding or running from them is part of the shared human experience.” (163)
Friday 8.28.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
HUMAN
The mantra to remember...’I’m just human. I’m just human. I’m just human.” And humans make mistakes. (167)
“Perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right, you won’t have to die. The truth is that you will die anyway and that a lot of people who aren’t even looking at their feet are going to do a whole lot better than you, and have a lot more fun while they’re doing it.” - Anne Lamont (p166)
“Self-compassion is embracing our humanity, owning that we are a muddled mix of dust and divinity.” - Joanna (p168)
Saturday 8.29.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
RESILENCE
“Resilience is the ability to navigate adversity, failure, and change with as much health as possible. It’s the ability to absorb pain and struggle but not let it kill us. It’s a bounce-back-ness that isn’t fake or denying of reality but deep and tangible. “ (p170)
“But here’s the greatest part – we don’t have to try to stand up alone. The practice of failing requires help from others. Like Aaron holding his brother Moses’ hands up when he became weary in the Old Testament book of Exodus, our friends can lift us back up again and again and stand alongside us, shoulder to shoulder, toe to toe, hearts supporting hearts, hands lifting heads.” (172)
Sunday 8.30.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
SELF RECRIMINATION (The Flogging Machine)
“Whatever you do, try not to dwell too long on your failures. You don’t need to conduct autopsies on your disasters.” - Elizabeth Gilbert (175)
“Part of embodying something different is dismantling the flogging behavior, the negative, debilitating power in our lives, and travel lighter. It doesn’t mean we don’t take a trip into the flogging machine now and then, but it means we stop hiding out there for too long as a way of avoiding our next failure. (176)
Instead of beating ourselves up, let’s consider how we can use our perceived failure for good...We must honor that everything we’ve done is an opportunity to grow,… (177)
God, we admit that we’re often afraid to fail.
Remind us of our humanness.
Strengthen our resilience.
Give us courage to stand back up, again and again.
Help us be people who are willing to risk, try, fail. Amen.
Chapter 9: The Practice of RESTING
“Rest and be thankful.” -William Wadsworth
Monday 8.31.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
REST
“We tend to take better care of others than we do ourselves.” - Phileena Heuertz
“We can’t help others if we are barely breathing ourselves.” (p185)
“Don’t forget. Even God rested.” - Genesis 2:2
“Every person needs to take one day away. A day in which one consciously separates the past from the future…..Each person deserves a day away in which no problems are confronted, no solutions searched for. Each of us needs to withdraw from the cares which will not withdraw from us.” - Maya Angelou
Tuesday 9.1.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
SOUL CARE
“Meaningful soul care is about making sure we are tending to the deepest parts of our experience, that we are grounding ourselves in the roots of God’s love, peace, mercy and hope, so we can do the work that we are called to do in the world.” (186)
The question that’s nost important for all of us in the practice of rest is: WHAT DOES OUR UNIQUE AND TIRED SOUL NEED RIGHT NOW? That’s not always easy to discern, but a start is trying to switch out of a reactive mode into a proactive one – seeking rest in creative ways that work for us.” (187)
Wednesday 9.2.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
RHYTHM
Building a rhythm of rest is participating with the natural cadences of life. (190)
“Reclaiming the relationship between stillness and action, or between solitude and relationship, is part of the desire to come back into relationship with the wisdom of nature’s rhythms. The earth knows its patterns of night followed by day, of winter barrenness succeeded by spring energy and summer fruiting...We know that if we don’t give ourselves over to the darkness and dreaming of nighttime...we will only be half-awake to the demands and creativity of the day.” - John Philip Newell
Thursday 9.3.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
ANAM CARA
In the Celtic tradition, a term for Sabbath friends is Anam Cara, which in Gaelic means soul friend. ….with soul friends, ‘time and distance don’t matter, we can always pick up where we left off, and we’re always both givers and receivers, one no better or worse than another.’ (191)
Sabbath friends are the kinds of friends who are ‘safe in a place of welcoming, rest, and belonging’ for the soul. When together, we can feel grounded, centered, and loved...peace begins to flow into the places of my soul that need it. (191)
Friday 9.4.20
WORDS OF THE DAY:
WILD THINGS
PEACE AT WILD THINGS by Wendell Berry
“When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children’s lives might be.
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water,
and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.”
God, we get tired, weary, overwhelmed, exhausted.
Help us rest.
Rest our souls, bodies, minds, hearts.
May the embers that need igniting strengthen us.
May we keep finding peace in the wild things. Amen.
Chapter 10: The Practice of CELEBRATING
“Throwing parties, sharing stories, finding hope, practicing the ways of Jesus as best we can.” - A Refugee tagline
Saturday 9.5.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
CELEBRATE!
Celebrate – verb
1. To publicly honor events or experiences
2. To remember important milestones in creative ways
3. To acknowledge successes and positive movements
Every positive movement in the human experience is worth celebrating...Often we’re just too darn serious all the time...Typically when we scale through the most common spiritual disciplines we think of silence, solitude, fasting, prayer, worship, and service. The intent of each of these is to somehow deepen our connection with God. While I value these in different ways, I think we’re missing a really important one – celebrations and parties as a core spiritual discipline. (203)
Sunday 9.6.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
PARTY
Jesus loved a good party! He went to people’s houses to eat with diverse groups of folks, attended weddings and hosted outdoor picnics. A lot happens at community gathering and parties where people have an opportunity to eat together, laugh, play, drop our guard, and find our shared humanity. (204)
Every party or celebration is a beautiful form of communion, a celebration of life, an openness to the wind of the Spirit of God into our lives individually and collectively. (205)
Monday 9.7.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
GRATITUDE
Embedded into the practice of celebrating is gratitude. “To experience gratitude is to experience an appreciation of the present moment, of what we possess right now...Gratitude is a gift that centers us firmly in the here and now.” (Luna and Sol) Often we’re so focused on the future that we forget to celebrate the present. (209)
The Ignatian Prayer of Daily Examen is centered on creating contemplative space where we notice God’s presence in our lives at the end of the day. Mix that up and look for some things they are grateful for today, that they want to celebrate, notice, acknowledge…. There is always something to be grateful for, and that’s part of the practice of celebrating. (209)
Tuesday 9.8.20
WORD OF THE DAY:
RESURRECTION
Resurrecting words are part of the practice of celebrating….words such as awakening, bouncing back, making whole, overcoming, renewing, rekindling….My hope is that we’d be people who are constantly resurrecting in our own lives and helping others do the same in theirs. (211)
The world needs resurrection stories! We need to hear the good, witness courage, and be inspired. In the midst of the brokenness that’s often so much easier to see, these stories of healing, hope, redemption, new life – no matter how small or big – help strengthen and encourage us individually but also help ignite faith in the good of humanity. (Paraphrase 212)
God, give us eyes to notice transformation in our own lives and those around us. From brief prayers of gratitude to big, creative parties, help us honor and celebrate the good. Keep reminding us that the old is always dying, the new is always coming. We want to keep resurrecting. Amen.
CONCLUSION
Against all odds and past history, we are loved and chosen, and do not have to get it together before we show up. - Anne Lamont
Wednesday, September 9
WORD OF THE DAY:
PATIENCE
One of the most important things I’ve learned over twenty-five years of slogging in the trenches with my own soul work and the heart and guts of others is how freaking long real transformation takes. I never measure things in days, weeks, months or even years anymore….Give it a decade! (217-218)
Part of being healthier people of practice in the world is also acknowledging more honestly that we won’t be able to topple systems of inequality quickly or become a master at holding space for differing views overnight or all of a sudden wake up completely healed from some of the patterns we’ve been used to doing in our lives for years. … Focus on repetition, intention, and ongoing improvement. (218)
Thursday, September 10
WORD OF THE DAY:
GENTLE
It’s so good to accept our limitations and remember we’re just learners. There’s no reason to get mad at ourselves when we screw up….(219)
It can be lonely and frustrating when we change and others around us don’t. When we start advocating for people who others around us don’t seem to care about. When we start changing the way we are showing up in the world and friends and family begin to notice and start to wish we hadn’t changed because they liked us better when we were quieter, nicer, and less engaged. ...Accept that when we change, our relationships sometimes change also. (219)
Friday, September 11
WORD OF THE DAY:
PRACTICE
Whether you consider yourself a follower of Jesus or not, a life of changing ourselves to change the world is going to be a bumpy, windy, weird road. We will have good and bad days, better and worse seasons. ...We will stumble and bumble….We will wonder if it’s all worth it. (220)
I’ve no doubt that a life of practice is worth every bit of blood, sweat, tears, guts, and heart we put into it over our lifetime. We are meant to be in relationship. We are meant to embody a better way. We are meant to be the hands and feet of Jesus in a world that’s crying out for hope – not haggling over Bible verses or theological differences. (220)
God, we need your courage to keep practicing. Help us stay the course when we want to give up. Stir our hearts, move our feet, rock our world. We're ready, we’re willing, we’re open. Help us keep changing ourselves so we can change the world. Amen. (221)
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